Sunday, March 08, 2015

International woman's day

Guess what... I'm blogging so I'm bored as can be! So since today it's International Woman's Day. I, of course think about how amazing of a woman I have become. 
Just kidding. 
I actually did reflect on who I am as a woman and had some thoughts come to mind.
This year I turn 30 and I can't say enough how much I have learned in my twenties. 
I had 5 kids, including twins, moved a few times and have done numerous small companies etc. But none of this can explain how much I've grown as a person and how I've become who I finally think I'm meant to be. 

I reflect on myself a lot. Am I a nice person. I think so. Am I forgiving. Depends how bad you piss me off. Am I patient. Ask my husband. Am I happy. Ask my therapist... kidding. 
These are some things that are important to who I am so I'm constantly working on them and more, many more.  
There's one thing I have learned that is so important in becoming a good mom and wife and that is to take care of myself first. I used to think it was selfish but I saw the downfall when I didn't take care of myself. I went through some postpartum after having Laken off and on and it was really hard. I realized who was there for me in life and who I can really rely on in times of need. I also learned how important it is for me to be happy and healthy in order to be the mom and wife I need to be. If times get tough, which trust me they do, I make sure I do not let myself get to the point where I'm sinking. I have amazing sisters, an amazing husband and an amazing sister in law who I would say are my most important people I can rely on. Sometimes just talking it out is all I need. Holding it in just makes you crazy. Sometimes it's literally Dustin taking Parks while I cook and clean. Who knew I would actually WANT to do those things but just being me in my own head while I focus on a task truly helps escape the chaos sometimes. I mean I'd take a spa day too... Ahem, Dustin. 

I am in NO way perfect. I get impatient, I yell at my kids, my house is never 100% clean, we have kraft dinner and sandwiches for lunch way too often, and I don't sit and read to my kids every night. Hell I don't even read. That's why we have Kyla. But you know what, I never stress about these things. I don't stress about the small stuff and that makes a huge difference in my life. I also don't let other peoples stresses or drama get to me, it's not allowed. If it doesn't affect my husband and kids I brush it off.

Another major thing I do want to touch on is how much I've let go of what other people think about me. I used to care. I cared about the choices I made in life if people approved of them but I (we) came to the realization that no matter what choice you make in life, there will always be someone who doesn't approve. ALWAYS. So we choose what's best for us and our kids and that's all that matters. No one else's opinion matters. This has changed our life in the best way and we are the happiest we've ever been! It's amazing when you start living your life for you and not others. It's also cool to see who accepts you for the way you choose to live! 

I can't explain the amount of growth I have done in the last 5 years. I'm still Mindy, and I still feel like I'm 16 questioning who gave me all this responsibility! But, I'm becoming everything I WANT to be. I try to be the best of me I can be everyday and that's all that matters. I hope I can set an example to my girls of what kind of woman, mother and wife they want to grow into. Even if it's one thing they look up to me for then I will feel like I've conquered the world. 


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